I have always wanted to go rock climbing. I am not talking about free climbing. But true rock climbing- in the Rocky Mountains. Harnesses, Hooks, Grips, gear and all. I have free climbed in the Smokey Mountains and try to as often as I can. But one day, I want to climb a mountain with just me, a harness, some gear, and God. In the beauty of His highest mountains. After I get to the top, I want to repel back down; looking at how far I came.
There is a picture in my head of me, in a dark pit. I have a harness around me, and I am there, waiting against the side, hanging onto a rope. Praying I don't fall again. I am worried; I am afraid. It is very dark. I can't see anything- all I can see is the rope, the harness and the rocks and dirt surrounding me. I am hanging on for dear life.
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I did not understand why He had failed me. At 4:30 a.m. on Wednesday, July 10th; I told God, He failed me. He did not keep His promise to me. I was broken beyond belief. I recited His Word back to Him that He had promised me, "No weapon that is fashioned against you shall succeed and you shall confute every tongue that rises against you in judgement." (Isaiah 54:17 ESV) Well, that was not true. He failed me, because a weapon of manipulation was used against me, and it won. I lost the battle. I got wounded. He failed me.
The tears; the sorrow, the pain, it all came rushing out of me like a flood. Almost 2 years of oppression, disappointment, sins and lost hope came pouring out of me. Then I heard a whisper; a very still whisper say, "I created the blacksmith who blows the fire coals and produces a weapon for its purposes. I have also created the ravager to destroy;" (Isaiah 54:16) {How quickly we only take from His Word what we want to hear. Make sure you are reading His Word in context.}
Then it hit me. He didn't fail me. His promise is still working. His promise is coming. He can't stop the thorns and thistles from coming up in my path. Remember, "Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap." (Galatians 6:7 KJV) The world calls it Karma. What goes around comes around. My sins caused this thorn to rise up in my way; wounding me. All He can do is redeem me from the death of it. I am wounded, but I am not dead. I still have to suffer the consequences of my choices. (That's what sin is- when you know to do right, but choose to do wrong. It's not only the doing- its the thought of doing it that is sin. (Matthew 5:28)
But now that I have healed from my wounds; now that I have waited, trusted and relied on Him; He has taken that thistle bush out of my path and burned it in the fire. It is ash. And out of it He is making me into the climber I need to be for what is in front of me. I can now, wipe the dust off my feet and rest at ease. I am free. Free from that weapon ever again. Soldiers get wounded in battle. The longer they battle the more wounds and scars they take along the way. But, they did not die. They did suffer; but they became stronger and wiser. That weapon will never be formed against me again. He conquered it. He allowed it. He used it to strengthen me and equip me for the climb ahead. That was and is His promise. Amen?
He knows my sins before I sin them. He knows my rising up, my sitting down; my hiding places-there is nowhere to hide from Him. (Psalm 139) He did not ask Adam why He was hiding because He didn't know where He was. He asked Adam so Adam knew what he had done. God allows sin to come into our lives. Free Will- We choose either sin or holiness. Simple as that. He knows which one we are going to choose before we choose it. He has seen it, worked it to our good and His glory, and He has cleared the path. Get ready to climb when He says,"Go." Amen?
Like any good rock climber knows, it takes patience and precise holds to get to the top. If you don't pace yourself, go slow and prepare your next grip, or foothold- well, let's just say- it ain't good. Sometimes, no matter how prepared you think you are; you stick your hand or foot where it doesn't belong and you get bit. Or you get stung. You get pricked. You get wounded. You are going to react, slip, fall and get hurt worse, if you are not careful. If you do not repent and turn back to God. He has His Harness of Grace around me. But it's up to me whether I stay secure in His grip, or I try to get ahead and stick my hand where it doesn't belong. My choice. Yes, God knows. But is it worth the fall, the hurt, the pain and the scars to have to face this climb all over again? No. It is not. I am going up and out of here. Amen!
I need to be patient. Tighten my grip on the Harness of His Grace, and wrap my hands in the rope of His mercy. God is securing the next hook for me to rope into, so I can begin my next climb. I am about to level up. He is ahead of me, clearing the way. Hold onto the rope and wait for Him to tell me when it's safe to move.
In the meantime, I need to prepare for the journey. I need to be prepared to "Climb" when He says "Climb". God told Moses to tell the Israelites to get ready for the journey. To be ready to go quickly.
Prepare. Pack. Make yourself ready. When He says "Go". There is nothing stopping me. If God opens a door, no man can shut it. (Amen!)
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Another lesson He taught me, while I am packing what I think I will need for the journey- well, He is stripping it away. He is removing it from my life. There are things in my life, people, places, things, that He is showing me need to stay behind. We must take our hands off the plow and follow Him. Not look back. But just go when He says "Go."
He is fulfilling me in other ways. Showing me how I can rest, have peace and wait patiently for Him. He has given me a work to do. I must to it. Thankfully, however, I am climbing with more strength and understanding and wisdom this time. The truth is, and a truth the Lord placed in my heart- the value that I have gained during this time of self examination, solitude; season- is more precious than any wound or scar I might ever have. What He is working in me is far greater than anything I could ever hope or think. That is enough for me.
And, this time, I am going to climb higher. I am going to be stronger so I can sustain myself longer. I am wiser so I won't step or grab somewhere He hasn't already cleared for me. I will follow Him. In the meantime, I will wait. I will do the work. I will pack, prepare, and plan for the journey to come. I will wait and trust in Him to secure the way. In Him I will trust. What better place could I be, but where I am- in the Harness of His Amazing Grace? Amen?
**If you read my blog, I would appreciate any feedback you want to give. I am open to opinions, ideas, thoughts, comments, etc. Be kind. But be honest. And if you find any typos or grammar errors, I would appreciate the heads up! I pray it inspires you to look up to Him. Even if for a minute.
Amen?**
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