Friday, October 10, 2014

Introduction: Winning Him Without A Word

You didn't get married as Christians, but now you are and he isn't, and you find yourself unequally yoked in marriage. He is in the world, living in sin, and you are seeking a holy God who wants you to be separated from the world, and live for Him alone. Finding my way through these years with my husband was difficult, but it was through the love and compassion of my God that gave me the strength to face the battle that was just beginning. Each and every day you are faced with a man who wants nothing to do with “your” God and cares only for himself and the things of the world. You desire to be obedient to God yet you have this darkness sleeping beside you every night. The way he looks at you is different, the things he says to you hurt, and you pray and pray but all you seem to do is fight with him over the things of God that he has no desire to know.
            So how do we, as women of God, live with and love our unbelieving husbands. How do we walk with God when they won’t? How do we submit to a man who doesn’t want God in his life? How do we love them through the darkness and show them the light of the gospel of Jesus Christ? These are questions that I asked the Lord as I struggled with my husband year after year. I would be on my knees daily, begging God to save my husband, forgive my husband for the things he said and the things he did. My husband and I were living in two different worlds, yet living in the same house, trying to raise two children. The struggle wasn't easy, my sisters, but the reward is great.
            The Lord Jesus took me on a journey through 1 Peter 3. He showed me how to apply these scriptures to my marriage, how to pray for my husband, how to act and respond to him in such a way that God was able to work in his heart. The Lord gave me wonderful, godly women who were my mentors, who prayed with me and for my husband. I had a wonderful Bible Study leader who loved me and helped me see the love that Christ had for my husband. It was through the faithful, diligent prayers of all these people, as well as the life I lived before my husband every day that allowed God to do the work of Salvation in my husband’s heart. It was not what I said or didn't say, it was not how I behaved or didn't behave, but it was God alone who was able to use me as a vessel of grace to bring my husband to the knowledge of His salvation through Jesus Christ.
            There is no formula to follow, there are no 5 steps and your husband will become a Christian. It doesn’t work that way. Paul asks us in 1 Corinthians 7:16, “For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you shall save your wife?” This book is not intended to give you the steps you need to take to bring your husband to Christ, this book is from a heart of a woman who has been there, who has walked this way before. I did not save my husband, God saved my husband. I was less than perfect at being a Christian wife to him, but through prayer and following the Word of God my husband was able to see the light in the midst of his darkness.
            I had to learn the hard way, I had to pray and seek God daily for guidance, for wisdom, for understanding, for strength, for hope, for patience, just to name a few. Everything I needed to be the light in my husband’s darkness I found in 1 Peter 3. The Lord God knew my heart for my husband, and He knew who I needed to be for him. It wasn't my preaching and teaching that brought my husband to the Lord, it was the Lord Jesus Christ, Himself, shining a light through my obedience to His word that allowed God to work in the heart of the man I dearly desired to see born again.

            I want to reiterate that this is written with the intent to give you the strength you need to keep persevering, and give you the hope and comfort you so desperately seek as you live with your unbelieving husband. I do not know whether or not your husband will ever come to Christ, and neither do you. Only the Lord Jesus Christ can give you that answer. But I do pray that you will draw strength from Him through the words He has given me, and see the glory of His presence in your life as I share with you the most difficult walk of our lives. You are the light, and he is the darkness, but there is hope in Christ Jesus our Lord. 
           This is an excerpt from my first book: Winning Him Without a Word; Learning to love and live with an unbelieving husband. This book was written as a personal testimony with the hopes of encouraging others who are struggling with being unequally yoked. If you, or someone you know is living with an unbelieving husband, or even a husband who has not yet taken the reins of spiritual leader, I believe the words the Lord has given me to share will be a blessing to you and them. It is my desire that this book will encourage all women, married to unbelievers, or married to godly men to live and love them the way Christ desires us to love them. I pray that you will be blessed, and may the Lord Jesus Christ give you the strength to live out your faith before the one you love. Amen and Amen.