My favorite book used to be Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austin. I would read the book, then watch the movie, then sit and dream about a day when my Mr. Darcy would come and declare his undying love for me and whisk me away to some castle where we would live happily ever after. In all reality, this is a dream, a dream that I thought I could never have. The desire to have that happily ever after that we as women grow up desiring never became a reality until the day I met my Prince. But it took years for me to find Him. It took tears and pain, hurt and many broken hearts to realize that the prince that I sought was not on this earth.
After I became a Christian, my husband and I were still on rocky ground. We never really had a romantic relationship; he is just not wired that way. He tries, and he loves me, of that there is no doubt. But the kind of romance that I needed was not something I was going to find in my marriage, or in any marriage for that matter. The kind of romance I needed came from my True Prince, my One True Love that had declared His undying love for me upon a cross where He sacrificed His life so that He could be a part of mine.
I did not always see my Jesus as my Prince Charming, my Knight in Shining Armor, it wasn’t until I read somewhere about a woman who was struggling with loneliness in her life. She was married, as I was, but yet there was this undeniable desire to be romanced in such a way that would change her life forever. She wrote that she stood outside one day and said, “Jesus, Romance Me.” I was intrigued by this thought, and deep inside me my heart was crying out with her, “Yes Jesus, my Jesus, romance me.”
I took my bible and I went outside to a place where He and I could be undisturbed. I raised my head up to the heavens and I cried out, “Romance me”, and He did, right there in the middle of my front yard, I met Jesus for the first time as my Prince Charming, my Knight in Shining Armor, my One True Love had come and was prepared to whisk me away to His forever Kingdom. I remember this day so clearly, because of the way He romanced me. The fragrance of the trees and the flowers around me was so strong and vibrant, and the wind would lightly caress my cheek as I sat there in His presence. It was like I could feel Him through the wind and smell Him in the fragrance of the air around me. I had never experienced His presence like that before, and I fell completely and utterly in love. He was romancing me.
Even though He romanced me that day, and I fell captivated at His feet, I still had trouble with loneliness. Loneliness is like a grey cloud that settles in your heart and after years of experiencing it, we get pretty good at pushing it aside, or burying it. The disappointments we face day to day become easier to bear because we resign ourselves to the fact that this is life and I just need to learn to deal with it. But the loneliness is still there. It is still inside my soul, it is still a whole in my heart that I seek to fill, that I need to fill. I seek earthly ways to fill it, through my marriage, my children, my church, I do whatever I can so that I don’t have to face the reality- I am lonely.
This morning the loneliness would not stay down. I began to flow out of me like a volcano. I was reminded of His love for me; I was reminded of how He and I used to spend the day loving one another. I have lost some of that lately because I am seeking it from man rather than from Him. I see these fairy tales on the TV, or I see a husband and wife so hopelessly in love that my heart begins to long for that kind of love as well. But I have gotten very good at pushing down the loneliness and dealing with it. Today, however, He would not let me push it down anymore. He would not let me deal with it the way that I was, He wants better for me, He wants me to see and to know that all that I seek is found in Him. That love that I seek and desire, I can have in Him. That fulfillment that I seek in my days, I have in Him. All that I need, all that I want, all that I can ever hope for is found in Him. He is my happily ever after.
Hebrews 13:5 says, “Let your conduct be without covetousness, be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” These words brought my loneliness to the forefront and there was no denying it anymore. My conduct, the manner in which I live my life, let it not be full of wishing and wanting things different. He is telling me that to fill up that loneliness inside me I have to let go of the wishing and dreaming and put all my hope in Him. I need to go back to that place where He romanced me, and allow Him to romance me again today and then again tomorrow. No greater love have we ever been given than the love that Christ Jesus shed for us upon that cross. The love that He has for us is intimate, it is perfect, and it is exactly what we seek. We need to fall in love with our Lord and Savior. We need to allow Him to sing over us, to romance us with the caresses of His wind, the fragrance of His creation. We need to stop seeking the fairy tale on earth and seek the True Prince in heaven.
He also told me today that He will never leave me. He will, under no circumstances ever let me go or loosen His grip on me. He cradles me in His arms, and in His arms I will always be. He will never forsake me; He will never abandon me or leave me wanting. He will always and forever be all that I need all that I desire and all that I love. Song of Solomon 2:6 tells us that “His left hand is under my head and His right hand embraces me”. All women seek to be romanced, we seek to be loved like Cinderella and like Elizabeth in Pride and Prejudice, and we are- daily. We are loved beyond love; we are desired by our One True Love. There is not a day that goes by that He doesn’t show you His love for you. There is not a flower on this earth that He did not create just for you. His love for you is so intimate, so great, and so passionate that you will never experience anything like it.
If you are feeling that pang of loneliness in your life today, as I am, I want you to go and find a place where you and He can be alone. Take your bible and open it to Song of Solomon- it is His love letter to you. Lift up your eyes to heaven and cry out with all that is within you, “Romance me, my Jesus. Romance me.” Then sit and allow Him to encompass you, to embrace you with His love and His desire for you. You can have that happily ever after, with Jesus as your Love, your Lord and your Prince, we will all live happily ever after, for all eternity. Amen.