My son is sick and my heart is heavy for him today. My son, Jacob, is 19 years old and has just gotten a fantastic job working with a local company. He worked so hard to get this job and my husband and I were very pleased and proud of how he went about it. But a few days ago, he became ill on the job and fainted. This is not the first time this has happened to him, it has happened before. The last time it happened he fainted and busted his head open and staples had to be put in.
My heart is going from “he’s going to be okay” to “what if something is terribly wrong”. As moms we worry for our kids, not in an ungodly way, but in a way that causes us to fall on our knees and beg God to take us and not them. How many times as mothers have we found ourselves going before the Lord God begging for Him to help our children. No matter who are children are, they are our children, and as mom’s we worry about them.
Even though my heart is heavy for my son, and there is a fear that something is physically wrong with him, my other worry is that he could lose the one job he has worked so hard to get. My son is a prodigal child. He was once very active and involved in the church, gave his life to Christ at a young age, but somewhere along the line has lost his way. He has a great gift from God in regards to music as well as teaching others. When he was in middle school, he used to preach on the bus ride home to all the kids. But, much like the prodigal son, he has taken the gifts that the Lord God has given him and has decided to try life out his way.
We never know how God is going to bring someone to Him. We do not know the ways of God and how He works in the hearts of those around us, but that shouldn’t make us give up. I know the promises the Lord God has given me personally in regards to my son, and I am standing firm upon those promises. But today, my hearts cry is for Jacob’s health and his future. My heart’s cry is for God to use and to do whatever He has to do to bring my son back to Him. Some of you may say that is not the way to pray for my lost son, and you may be right. But isn’t that our hearts cry as mothers? Whatever it takes, Lord Jesus, whatever it takes.
Isn’t that what God the Father decided to do when He sent His only Son to die for our sins? He did whatever it took to get us to the point where we have nowhere else to turn but to Him? Just as our hearts as mothers, grandmothers, sisters, wives cry out for the Lord to do what He must do, so does God’s heart cry out for us. “Whatever it takes for whoever will hear.” I can imagine the Lord Jesus Christ and God our Father saying those words over my son, over my daughter, over my husband, and even over me.
There is no wall that we can put up that God can’t tear down. There is no place we can hide that God cannot seek us out and find us. David said in Psalm 139: 7-10, “Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? If I ascend into heaven, You are there; if I make my bed in hell, behold You are there. If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there Your hand shall lead me. And Your right hand shall hold me.” Whatever He has to do for whoever will listen. That is the God that I serve.
I know in my heart that God is in complete control of the situation with Jacob. And that He can do a mighty work in Jacob’s heart. He did one in mine, so I know He can do it with Jacob as well. God is willing; He desires to pull us in and to pour out in us His grace and His mercy. It is us that have to be the willing recipients. Just like the Prodigal son had to come to a place and point in his life where he had nowhere else to turn but to his Father, so shall all of us, hopefully it will be sooner rather than later.
Yes, my heart is worried with a mother’s worry, and my heart is scared for what the future may hold for my son, but I am confident that God will do what He desires to do in and through the life of Jacob and through me. My trust is in God, my hope is in God, my worry is placed at His feet, and He hears my cries and my prayers, however I speak them, He hears them. He hears the depths of our hearts, not the syllables of our lips.
No matter where my son goes, no matter what happens to him, no matter what comes upon him, God is there. Where can my son go from God’s Spirit? Nowhere, for even in the depths of our darkness, even in the depths of the earth, God is present and God is near. Today, the Lord Jesus Christ and God our Father cry out, “Whatever it takes for whoever will hear.” If you are a whoever, may I urge you to cry out, “Here I am, whatever it takes, Lord, whatever it takes.” When we do this, God can do some mighty and amazing things.
May the Lord Jesus Christ find us "whoever's" and pour out in us the grace and the mercy that He desires to give so abundantly.